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Thread: Parenting TIPs

  1. #1
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    Default Parenting TIPs

    Assalamu alaikum wr wb

    Not a lot of people have posted in here in a long time, not much activity nor participants in here.

    I'm assuming there is a good portion of us though that fall into the "Parenting" range stage, that we were once young frequenting on here, and now we're reaching that age of maturity in which we're all starting our own families and for those of us that already have children, and the ages range in from little babies to young teens and such, I'm sure we all have some advice to pass onto others, sharing our pros and cons of it, and even just sharing our experiences with each other.

    I've always found talking about how we raise our children, not necessarily in exact details that we all follow that one method style of way. But, more in the sense that well, for example. My friend had trouble putting her baby to sleep, she tried all of it. The pacing, and driving at night etc, and putting the baby into her carseat and putting her on top of the dryer, etc none of those worked. And finally, she settled on one thing of playing some lullabyes, or nasheeds, or qur'an and that would soothe the baby to sleep, and help calm her down.

    Another felt that if she wore one favorite t-shirt a lot, wore it to the point that she sweat in it, and her total smell was in it. She could easily put it around her baby, then go and get all her work done in the house because that little baby, (only works if it's a little baby....) that she'll get it done without her baby crying to be in her arms all day long.

    My method of style is I tell my kids honestly what I need them to do. When they're crying I tell them honestly without all the baby talk, "Look....I can't understand you with all that whining. Wipe your tears, calm down a bit, take a deep breath and just talk to me, tell me exactly what you're looking for and how I can help you. I won't talk to you until then." then I'll leave and they'll follow me, as they wipe their tears and trying to ask me something of some sort of wanting something. Depends though.

    I'm looking for those parenting tips....like how do you deal with someone that decides to not allow their children to grow at their own pace and have their own sense of imagination and sense of style compared to your own children?

    What I mean is that I like my children to grow at their own pace, and have their own sense of sensibility of being their own person, without them following a certain set of people to be a certain way. They need to find their own personality, and be their own person. Yet, it's so hard these days in the society when they have peer pressures from all around...negatively and positively. But, still.....they tend to have a lot of judgment from people, muslims and non muslims and especially the muslims , well some of them that seem to think they know it all, and feel it is their duty to tell you so.
    SO, if these children wish to have their own sense of being, they will be told that they can't because Islam does not allow one to have a sense of their own rope, which is wrong.
    All those mixed signals is just going to push them further away, rather than bring them closer, no matter what anyone thinks, do's or says.
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    Kids like to test their boundaries. If they get away with something once, they'll expand the boundary next time. It's one of those "if you give them an inch, they'll take a mile" situations.

    The most import thing as a parent is to keep your kids in check and not let them anywhere near the boundary, by being proactive parents.

  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by UmmIby View Post
    My method of style is I tell my kids honestly what I need them to do. When they're crying I tell them honestly without all the baby talk, "Look....I can't understand you with all that whining. Wipe your tears, calm down a bit, take a deep breath and just talk to me, tell me exactly what you're looking for and how I can help you. I won't talk to you until then." then I'll leave and they'll follow me, as they wipe their tears and trying to ask me something of some sort of wanting something. Depends though.
    That sounds like me I prefer telling my daughter that she needs to be able to talk to me if she wants something as I can't understand what she wants if she just cries ...

    Hmmm, I'm not sure if I can give you many parenting tips as my daughter is only 4 and I've still got a long way to go. What I can say is that kids watch your every move and listen very attentively and if you're teaching them something, you've got to lead by example as they're bound to tell you that you told them 'such and such' but you're doing the opposite.
    A pirate was captured & brought before Alexander the Great. Alexander asked the pirate: 'How dare you molest the people?' The pirate replied:'And how dare you molest the entire world? I am called a thief because I do it with a little ship only. You do it with a great navy & you are called an Emperor!'
    Under this scenario, powerless people doing trivial acts are the major terrorists of the world whilst major powers perpetrating terrorism in many parts of the world are the civilised barbarians.

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    I always find it's hard to discipline kids in Ramadan. I particularly don't feel like spending my day, while fasting, screaming at and threatening the kids to behave. What are we supposed to do when they misbehave? Reasoning, discussing, pleading, rewards, punishment, nagging - nothing works. I'm talking about for young kids here - under 7. Do we just ignore the misbehavior and be patient? I'm beginning to think that that's what we have to do...


    “Say: O My slaves who have transgressed against themselves! Despair not of the Mercy of Allah, verily Allah forgives all sins. Truly, He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.” (39:53)

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    Parents: Check Your Kid’s Texts for these 28 Acronyms, and What They Mean

    12/8/14

    If you think you are tech savvy all because you know what “LOL” means, let me test your coolness.

    Any idea what “IWSN” stands for in Internet slang?

    It’s a declarative statement: I want sex now.

    If it makes you feel any better, I had no clue, and neither did a number of women I asked about it.

    Acronyms are widely popular across the Internet, especially on social media and texting apps, because, in some cases, they offer a shorthand for communication that is meant to be instant.

    So “LMK” — let me know — and “WYCM” — will you call me? — are innocent enough.

    But the issue, especially for parents, is understanding the slang that could signal some dangerous teen behavior, such as “GNOC,'” which means “get naked on camera.”

    And it certainly helps for a parent to know that “PIR” means parent in room, which could mean the teen wants to have a conversation about things that his or her mom and dad might not approve of.

    Katie Greer is a national Internet safety expert who has provided Internet and technology safety training to schools, law enforcement agencies and community organizations throughout the country for more than seven years.

    She says research shows that a majority of teens believe that their parents are starting to keep tabs on their online and social media lives.

    “With that, acronyms can be used by kids to hide certain parts of their conversations from attentive parents,” Greer said. “Acronyms used for this purpose could potentially raise some red flags for parents.”

    But parents would drive themselves crazy, she said, if they tried to decode every text, email and post they see their teen sending or receiving.

    “I’ve seen some before and it’s like ‘The Da Vinci Code,’ where only the kids hold the true meanings (and most of the time they’re fairly innocuous),” she said.

    Still, if parents come across any acronyms they believe could be problematic, they should talk with their kids about them, said Greer.

    But how, on earth, is a parent to keep up with all these acronyms, especially since new ones are being introduced every day?

    “It’s a lot to keep track of,” Greer said. Parents can always do a Google search if they stumble upon an phrase they aren’t familiar with, but the other option is asking their children, since these phrases can have different meanings for different people.

    “Asking kids not only gives you great information, but it shows that you’re paying attention and sparks the conversation around their online behaviors, which is imperative.”

    Micky Morrison, a mom of two in Islamorada, Florida, says she finds Internet acronyms “baffling, annoying and hilarious at the same time.”

    She’s none too pleased that acronyms like “LOL” and “OMG” are being adopted into conversation, and already told her 12-year-old son — whom she jokingly calls “deprived,” since he does not have a phone yet — that acronym talk is not allowed in her presence.

    But the issue really came to a head when her son and his adolescent friends got together and were all “ignoring one another with noses in their phones,” said Morrison, founder of BabyWeightTV.

    “I announced my invention of a new acronym: ‘PYFPD.’ Put your freaking phone down.”

    LOL!

    But back to the serious issue at hand, below are 28 Internet acronyms, which I learned from Greer and other parents I talked with, as well as from sites such as NoSlang.com and NetLingo.com, and from Cool Mom Tech’s 99 acronyms and phrases that every parent should know.

    After you read this list, you’ll likely start looking at your teen’s texts in a whole new way.

    1. IWSN – I want sex now

    2. GNOC – Get naked on camera

    3. NIFOC – Naked in front of computer

    4. PIR – Parent in room

    5 CU46 – See you for sex

    6. 53X – Sex

    7. 9 – Parent watching

    8. 99 – Parent gone

    9. 1174′ – Party meeting place

    10. THOT – That hoe over there

    11. CID – Acid (the drug)

    12. Broken – Hungover from alcohol

    13. 420 – Marijuana

    14. POS – Parent over shoulder

    15. SUGARPIC – Suggestive or erotic photo

    16. KOTL – Kiss on the lips

    17. (L)MIRL – Let’s meet in real life

    18. PRON – Porn

    19. TDTM – Talk dirty to me

    20. 8 – Oral sex

    21. CD9 – Parents around/Code 9

    22. IPN – I’m posting naked

    23. LH6 – Let’s have sex

    24. WTTP – Want to trade pictures?

    25. DOC – Drug of choice

    26. TWD – Texting while driving

    27. GYPO – Get your pants off

    28. KPC- Keeping parents clueless



    http://fox40.com/2014/12/08/parents-...hat-they-mean/


 

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